Comical Ali: Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf

  • These cowards have no morals. They have no shame about lying.
  • Baghdad is safe. The battle is still going on. Their infidels are committing suicide by the hundreds on the gates of Baghdad. Don't believe those liars ... I request you not to believe what the Americans are saying.
  • As our leader Saddam Hussein said, 'God is grilling their stomachs in hell'.
  • They are trapped in Umm Qasr. They are trapped near Basra. They are trapped near Nasiriya. They are trapped near Najaf. They are trapped everywhere.
  • There are no American infidels in Baghdad. Never!
  • I can assure you that those villains will recognize, will discover in appropriate time in the future how stupid they are and how they are pretending things which have never taken place.
  • These images are not the suburbs of Baghdad ... From what I glimpsed, these gardens with rows of palm trees on the side, which you saw in the images, are located in the south of Abu Ghreib, where we have surrounded the Americans and British.
  • They tried to bring a small number of tanks and personnel carriers in through al-Durah but they were surrounded and most of their infidels had their throats cut.
  • The Cruise missiles do not frighten anyone. We are catching them like fish in a river. I mean here that over the past two days, we managed to shoot down 196 missiles before they hit their target.
  • We besieged them and we killed most of them. We will finish them soon. My feelings? As usual, we will slaughter them all. Their tombs will be here in Iraq. They have no control even on themselves. Don't believe them. Those invaders will be slaughtered.
  • The valiant Republican Guards are encircling the enemy near the airport. We destroyed six tanks and damaged 10 others and killed 50 of the enemies' forces
  • I can assure you that those villains will recognize, will discover in appropriate time in the future how stupid they are and how they are pretending things which have never taken place
  • We made them drink poison last night and Saddam Hussein's soldiers and his great forces gave the Americans a lesson which will not be forgotten by history. Truly.
  • We will push those crooks, those mercenaries back into the swamp
  • They will fail, I am sure, they will fail even to come near to Baghdad.
  • They are a snake that is stretched over 500 km, we would like to stretch them even further and then start to chop them up.
  • This man [Rumsfeld] is the most despicable creature. Rumsfeld is ridiculous. He is a strange case.
  • This boa, the American columns, are being besieged between Basra and other towns north, west, south and west of Basra. The Americans are the people who are under siege ... Therefore, in reality whatever this miserable Rumsfeld has been saying, he was talking about his own forces. Now even the American command is under siege. We are hitting it from the north, east, south and west. We chase them here and they chase us there. But at the end we are the people who are laying siege to them. And it is not them who are besieging us. How can they lay siege to Baghdad where 6 million people live?
  • I can say, and I am responsible for what I am saying, that they have started to commit suicide under the walls of Baghdad. We will encourage them to commit more suicides quickly.
  • [Britain] is not worth an old shoe
  • We defeated them yesterday. God willing, I will provide you with more information. I swear by God, I swear by God, those who are staying in Washington and London have thrown these mercenaries in a crematorium.
  • Are these the Americans? People remain silent and placate the Americans. By God, they only deserve scorn. We slaughtered them yesterday and we will continue to slaughter them.
  • Do you know what these booby traps are? They are pens and pencils ... We told our people to avoid them and we confiscated them
  • I am not talking about the American people and the British people. I am talking about those mercenaries. ... They have started throwing those pencils, but they are not pencils, they are booby traps to kill the children.
  • We are going to tackle them and going to destroy them ... They are going to surrender or be burned in their tanks.
  • They are not even 100 miles [from Baghdad] ... They are not anywhere. They are like a snake moving in the desert. They have no foothold in Iraq. Their lies are endless ... They do not even control Umm Qasr.
  • They have no foothold in Iraq. We will welcome them with bullets and shoes.
  • Today, the tide has turned ... We are destroying them.
  • Yesterday we slaughtered them and we will continue to slaughter them.
  • What they say about a breakthrough is completely an illusion. They are sending their warplanes to fly very low in order to have vibrations on these sacred places ... And I think this will agitate, this will be scorned by all Shiites all over the world because those tombs are the most sacred to Shiites all over the world, and they are trying to crack the buildings by flying low over them.
  • They are sick in their minds. They say they brought 65 tanks into center of city. I say to you this talk is not true. This is part of their sick mind ... There is no presence of American infidels in the city of Baghdad at all.
  • The situation is excellent, they are going to try to approach Baghdad...and I believe their grave will be there.
  • We surrounded their forces with our special Republican Guards and we are finishing them off.
  • ...before the United Nations becomes a place for prostitution under the feet of the Americans.
  • God will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of Iraqis
  • Today we slaughtered them in the airport. They are out of Saddam International Airport. The force that was in the airport, this force was destroyed.
  • We butchered the force present at the airport
  • They [the Americans] are going to surrender or be burned in their tanks. They will surrender, it is they who will surrender.
  • American forces are being defeated. We besieged them and killed most of them. We will slaughter them all and bury them in Iraq
  • No, I am not scared and neither should you be!
  • They lie every day. Therefore what they say or allege about success and advances in Najaf and Kerbala are illusions.