Secret onions

It’s bad enough that onions are disgusting. But the crazy onion lovers have invented many new words that just mean onion so they can slip them past people in foods or on menus. Here are the main culprits.

Leeks

Prevalence: Low
Nausea Level: Medium
What the cookbooks say: With a more delicate and sweeter flavor than onions, leeks add a subtle touch to recipes without overpowering the other flavors that are present.
The reality: It’s not saying much that they have a more delicate flavor than onions. And it’s a lie that they don’t overpower other flavors.
Foods normally wrecked: Salad, Veal, Fish

Scallions

Prevalence: High
Nausea Level: High
What the cookbooks say: They tend to be milder tasting than other onions and are typically used raw in salads in western cookery.
The reality: They aren’t milder if you decide to always use them raw.
Foods normally wrecked: Soups, Salad, Tacos

Chives

Prevalence: Medium
Nausea Level: Medium
What the cookbooks say: To make the most of the delicate onion flavor of chives and retain the luscious green color in your recipes, use chives raw. Chive flowers are a welcome addition to salads and bring a touch of spring as a garnish to any dish.
The reality: No wonder I always hated spring.
Foods normally wrecked: Cold soups, stir-fried items, cheese and cream sauces, dips, potatoes

Shallots

Prevalence: Medium
Nausea Level: High
What the cookbooks say: Considered to be the gourmet member of the onion family due to its mild, delicate flavor, shallots are very similar to green onions, but develop in clusters of small bulbs rather than as individual onions. Shallot bulbs are small, generally elongated, and have a distinctively different flavor and odor as compared to onions.
The reality: The onion lovers always seem to describe the onion flavor as mild and delicate. Why would you pay more for this nastiness?
Foods normally wrecked: Just about anything that regular onions usually wreck.

6 Comments

  1. Maria
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 7:04 pm

    I am allergic to onions and have to be very careful to avoid them. It annoys me that so many restaurants do not disclose all of their ingredients. Just a little bit of any onion or onion-like thing makes me feel nauseous and sick for up to 4 days. Nothing relieves the misery. I just have to let it runs its course.

  2. PT
    Posted October 28, 2012 at 3:26 am

    I disagree. The onion lover who posted before me is a fucking idiot.
    I hope onions are growing around your tombstone.

    Onions are the most vile disgusting shit I have ever encountered. If you disagree, then I hope you’re destroyed when I obliterate all traces of this evil from the world. HAHAHA

    Woo!

  3. Kara Loko
    Posted May 21, 2012 at 1:50 pm

    Onions are disgusting for me too. Can’t stand them, never will… they just wreck everything.

  4. no
    Posted March 30, 2012 at 2:19 am

    This just went from being an awesome website to a shithole. What kind of jerk hates onions so much that he has to say they are disgusting? Frankly, you’re disgusting. Onions are awesome. Expand your tastes to something outside of ramen and takeout perhaps.

    • Posted August 7, 2012 at 12:54 pm

      actualy onion powder is one of the ingredients in ramen seasoning…. its pretty much in everything tha we eat becuase it enhances other flavors…..some people just don’t get it

    • GP
      Posted August 26, 2012 at 2:23 am

      I find it amusing that people get offended because some people don’t like onions. Unless you have his tongue and central nervous system, you won’t understand what onions taste like to him.

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